


With Or Without You

by AnAliasButSomeoneTookThatName



Category: Zootopia (2016)
Genre: Gen, Kinda Confusing, One Shot Collection, Sorry Not Sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-27
Updated: 2017-05-23
Packaged: 2018-09-02 12:49:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8668264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnAliasButSomeoneTookThatName/pseuds/AnAliasButSomeoneTookThatName
Summary: A lot of stories begin with a scene, and properly begin by explaining how that scene happenened.These are not those types of stories. Probably.





	1. With Or Without You

Nick sat in the plastic lawn chair, a beer in paw. He looked into the usually dark night sky, now lit up by the explosions of hundreds of fireworks all over the city.

As he sat there, finally, for once in a long, long time, the fox did something he had never imagined himself doing.

He let go.

He let go of the fact that he'd nearly died more times than he could count in the past week, the fact that he'd spent well too much on this case, the fact that the kits probably learned many, many new not-so-friendly words in the past 4 days from their captors, he let go of it all.

He took a deep breath.

"You would've loved this, Carrots." He seemingly admitted to the sky when the fireworks stopped exploding for a moment.

_I would've._

"You would have loved them Carrots, and they would have loved you, too," Nick looked towards the rabbit kits playing in grass in front of him. "They're just like you."

_I'd hope, Nick._

"I guess they filled that hole just like you did, didn't they?"

_They did, and well._

He looked back into the night sky, now lit up again with fireworks. "I'll miss you, always, and you'll always be my sly bunny."

_And you'll always be my dumb fox._

"God, its been a wonderful hustle, Judy, And I hope we can do it again,"

"In a better place."

 


	2. Cold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God, I have a thing for depressing one-shots, don't I?
> 
> Speaking of shots...

Judy Hopps never really liked the cold.

It made sense; She'd been raised on a farm, and cold usually meant they couldn't grow crops, or even just farm, due to the biting cold during winters, and that it makes the dirt roads harder to drive on.

And the fact that she'd lost siblings to it.

But, alas, she did like some things cold.

Like ice cream, although it was a little weird eating something that came from a cow, but she could see past it. Or cold pillows during the summers in the crowded, hot, city. Or, cold water, her favorite drink after a exercise session.

Alcohol was good cold, too, but honestly, the temperature of whatever garbage she drank didn't matter when the memories were coming back and the regrets are seeping in about how she never told him how she felt, but he told her in his final breath and now she just needs _something_ to help her forget all the blood, the sounds of bullets ripping apart soft red fur, soon to become cold and ever the more red. _Something_ to make her seem like she isn't - _scratch that_ \- hasn't been broken since he left. But the doe knows she can't just end it all like she's wanted to for _so_ long, because she's an _role model_ , _and role models don't off themselves._

But sometimes, she just hopes, prays, even, that the world could just forget about her, and just let her fade into obscurity so people can be surprised when they find out she was found with a bullet through her brain and a 44. in her paw.

The cold makes crying difficult, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Credits go to Combat Engineer for beta reading this.


	3. Gone

It was a dreary, cold autumn morning, which was fitting for the cemetery. The remains of flowers, once blooming and pretty, littered the grass surrounding the graves.

A fox walked towards one of the graves, a sad smile across his muzzle. He was dressed casually, and his stance reflected that, with his paws in his pockets to protect them from the nipping cold, but ultimately failing at the simple task.

"You would have loved these." Nick gestured towards the bouquet of White Carnations he'd taken out. "Probably."

He began to tear up, and wiped his eyes. "I knew you'd make me cry again. God, I love you." Nick admitted.

He placed the bouquet on the cold grave and looked over the small granite headstone. "Oh, you've got a little something there." He wiped a small vine off of the headstone.

"I'll never forget you, and I'll always love you." Nick lamented.

 

* * *

 

 

"So, where'd you head off to, Slick?"

Nick looked towards the bunny laying in a hospital bed, unfortunately made for mammals much bigger than her. Also rather unfortunately (for her, at least), it made her look quite cute. Although, you couldn't actually say that around her.

The fox rose out of his chair, and walked towards the doe.

"Morning Judy," He kissed Judy on the cheek, as a smirk travelled across his face. "I just went to go visit someone."

"Oh, who did you see?" Judy asked.

Nick stepped away from the bed and looked out of the door, towards the hospital cemetery. He remembered back to twenty minutes ago, and his smirk disappeared.

Nick looked back at her. "My mother."

Judy's smile reflected his. "Oh, your mother?" She asked, tilting her head slightly. "Will I get to meet her?" She asked.

"Unless that leg of yours gets a really bad infection, I don't think you'll get to meet her soon." He walked back into the room and sat in a chair next to Judy.

It took a moment for it to hit Judy.

Judy's eyes widened in surprise. "Oh- Nick," She stammered.

Before the rabbit could fully apologize, Nick cut in. "Its fine. She died a while ago anyway. " He assured, his signature smirk returning to his muzzle.

Judy's smile didn't return, though. Instead, she looked towards the white bedspread. "How did she die?" She asked slowly.

"Cancer," Nick sighed, and looked towards a window. His smirk, again, disappeared. "I was 22."

"You know," He continued, but stopped in realization. "She would have absolutely _loved_ you." Nick chuckled, emphasizing the "loved" by pointing at the now-smiling Judy.

That smile ( _of course)_ soon disappeared though, as Judy anxiously mulled over a question, her eyes pointing towards the hospital bed again.

"Nick," She began, looking directly into his emerald-green eyes. "Do you have _any_ family?"

Nick's smile also disappeared, and he took in a deep sign. He looked away from Judy, also thinking over an answer.

"Only you."

**Lots of thanks to Combat Engineer for helping me make this actually good.**


	4. What Changed When You Were Gone

The racing suit-clad rabbit threw herself out of the Formula 1ML racecar, struggling to climb out for a moment due to the height of the much larger racecar. She rushed towards the now-flipped identical car, aside from the livery, spluttering out curses in a panic.

"Shit, shit, shit! Nick!" Judy yelled, dodging other cars that didn't stop. As she reached her friend, she began to push the crumpled shell of his racecar. Flames bit at her small body, but didn't do any damage due to her racing suit. Two fire marshals soon arrived, but with empty paws and easily flammable clothing, rendering them useless.

In fact, every fire marshal that reached the scene then didn't have a fireproof suit (or fireproof anything, for that matter.). However, one was bringing a large fire extinguisher, clearly made for a larger mammal. Judy ran towards and grabbed the extinguisher from the marshal, and started spraying the burning racecar in a valiant attempt to keep her friend, who was now yelling for help from under the car, alive.

Unfortunately, the extinguisher barley managed to contain a portion of the fire, and Judy threw the now-useless fire extinguisher to the ground in frustration.

In a second attempt, she began to start pushing the car again, but was stopped before she got very far by a marshal.

"I'm sorry, but you aren't doing anything by pushing." The elk in marshal garbs pulled her shoulder back, and Judy looked at him. "Can you just please move to the other side of the track? All we can do now is wait for the fire engines."

Dejected, Judy walked away from the burning, now noticing that she couldn't hear Nick's screams anymore. All she could do at this point was hope the fire engines would come soon.

The first engine would arrive eight minutes later.

* * *

That was 30 years ago.

30 years since the world had lost a great driver and a wonderful mammal.

In those 30 years, not much had changed for Judy.

She'd get back into F1ML a year later, and would eventually leave in exchange for a place in the crazy Group B rallying scene, then prototype racing for a year, and she'd end up retiring from racing at 42 (to the relief of her now husband and kits), But would then end up becoming a presenter on a rather popular car show a year or so later, and would go on to say that the F1ML car she drove when Nick had died was probably the scariest car she'd ever driven.

The racing world, however, changed a fair bit from Nick's death. The very week the fox had died, rulemakers placed rules making fire-retardant clothing and proper training standard for all marshals on all circuits. Also, Judy's valiant actions ended encouraging other drivers began stopping to help crashed drivers, which actually ended up saving multiple lives.

But not Nick's.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My beta reader told me this hurt to read, which is exactly what I was going for.  
> Anyways, I decided to make a little piece about something else that was close to my heart; Cars. Or in particular early 1970s F1 racing, which was, as you can see, pretty dangerous. Actually, this was based off of an accident that occurred at Zandvoort Circuit in 1973 (rip Roger Williamson 1948-1973). 
> 
> (in case you are wondering, this story takes place in 1973, so I'd call it an AU.)  
> Anyways, Alias out.


	5. Anger

Judy gripped the faux-leather steering with anger.

_How could this happen? He was doing so well when I last saw him!_

"Miss Hopps-" She cut the doctor off, "Mrs. **Wilde** , to you!" She practically yelled inside of Nick's car.

"Mrs. Wilde, I'm sorry about your _husband_ , but there was an infection that went unnoticed until it was too late!" The doctor tried to explain to Judy, but it only made her angrier and more miserable.

"Please Mrs. Wilde. We'll need to you come in to file the papers."

Judy cleared quickly cleaned her eyes and put her paws back on the steering wheel, "When?" She choked out.

"Just, any time this week or next week." The doctor stopped speaking for moment, and began quietly, "I am incredibly sorry that this happened. Have a-a decent night." He hung up the phone.

Judy, now feeling somehow worse after being hung up on by her own doctor, pulled over to the side of the road. She wasn't sure how to feel. _God, Nick was right when he used to call me naive._

She realized that she had never had somebody so close to her die. So, in a moment of sadness-induced confusion, she followed what her body told her to do; She cried.

Turns out tears was the warmest thing she'd have for the rest of her life.

**Author's Note:**

> Credits to Combat Engineer for the title and beta reading this.


End file.
